In the Jewish circles I grew up in, the couple is the backbone of the family. The relationship with the wife comes first as does respect and love for her, even if your family never grows past 2.

In modern Christian families, in too many cases, the children are the backbone and the "leader" can lead as much or as little as he wants and the wife or ex-wife is just a tool to these ends. not a person. These men seem to feel that as long as they multiply, what they do after that is not important. Ish.